Deonna: [00:00:00] Hey y'all. Welcome back to Raising Disabled. So today we have our friend Brady CRhandyl on. He is the founder of a diaper company called Youth Crews, and this was inspired by his daughter. And so we're super excited to have you on and get to learn all about your family and your daughter, and then why you started this company because , me and Rhandyl both agree this company needed to be created and it fills a void in the diaper industry for disabled kids.

And so thank you so much for talking to us today. 

Brady: I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me. 

Deonna: Yeah. So first, just tell us all about your family and where you live and just all, just a little bit about you before we get started. 

Brady: Yes, I was, born and raised in Colorado. I was born in a city called Fort Collins. And funny enough, my mom actually was a pediatric occupational therapist. Oh. And so she used to do early intervention and I spent my childhood around a lot of kids who were [00:01:00] disabled. Oh, cool. And I thought, I guess the highlight of that is I thought I understood what it was like, and I really thought I was like an ally in all those things.

Until you realize when you're actually in it you, you know, nothing. That's like the way I was raised was my mom was a pediatric ot, and so that's always really funny.

Deonna: You were exposed to it. That's cool. 

Brady: Yeah, I was exposed to it. But the lesson from that is because my mom was a pediatric OT when our daughter was born. I think she understood more about what it all meant. And it was really hard. And the first time she came over to our house, she brought a book from like somewhere in the seventies and it was like, how to handle your child with cerebral palsy. And I was like, mom, she's a month old. 

Deonna: Oh my gosh. You're like, I'm not ready for this. 

Brady: I just had, we had to talk and be like, mom, that's your granddaughter. She's not like you're patient, like patient or a kid you saw and aw. I think it was hard for my [00:02:00] mom initially and then

Rhandyl: she was just trying to find a way to help. Yeah. 

Deonna: She knew what you were about to go through more than you probably did, and it just completely Yeah. Was probably really overwhelming to her. 

She was ready to educate you 

Brady: Yes. But the another thing is though, that we gotten like this heart to heart, cried out fight Uhhuh where I was a mom. , all about being an ot, but you came home to me and my brothers and sisters, , you didn't come home to a kid who's disabled, you've never spent 24 hours with anybody who's disabled. And that was like a big aha moment. Because I think she was like, oh yeah, shoot. It's not, 

Deonna: you don't, you can't escape it and go home and clock out of it. It's your every second of every day. You're in the thick of it. Yeah. So your mom was a therapist and does she still do that? 

Brady: She retired. But she's, she still Likes to keep up to date and Sure. Whenever she comes and visits, she always brings some [00:03:00] technique or tool or toy that she used to use back in her career. So it's still really funny. That's cool. And it's nice to call for advice because she knows a lot. 

Deonna: Yeah. Oh yeah. No, OTs are the best. We love our OTs. Do you live in Colorado still? 

Brady: , Yeah. So my wife and I got married right after we were both in college. We went to cu so we're big CU Buffs fans. I know you're a Red Raider. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so we, my wife and I met at cu. We got married and we quickly moved to San Francisco and lived there for six and a half years. Oh wow. And then moved back home to Colorado because we wanted to buy a house and have a family.

And then in 2020 my wife got pregnant with our first daughter, and it was the most normal, unremarkable, typical pregnancy. It was during all the Covid stuff. So it was definitely like, yeah. Weird and scary, but there was nothing unusual about the pregnancy. And then the day our daughter was born my wife's water broke, I wanna say it was like [00:04:00] 5 36 in the morning. And there was, I always forget how to pronounce the word, but meconium basically. 

Rhandyl: Oh, yeah. Meconium. Meconium, yeah.

Brady: And so we knew that was not good, but I had heard that wasn't necessarily as bad as it used to be.

Deonna: Yeah, it's pretty common. 

Brady: Yeah. But it was like, and definitely a little bit like, oh, that's not ideal. 

Deonna: Might have to be in the NICU for a day or two. Yeah. Yeah. 

Brady: So then we drove to the hospital that she was born at, and very quickly they put the, like the monitoring band on, and they saw that our daughter's heart rate was low. It was a lot lower than the like to see. And so instantly it felt like they, they whisked her away for emergency C-section. She was born it all happened so fast. I think by the time her water broke and by the time our daughter was born, it was like, I. An hour and something.

Wow. Wow. Yeah. Oh my gosh. In hindsight we've learned that, like when things happen that quickly, it's not a good thing. No, but we're glad that it, I guess also in hindsight it is a good thing 'cause she [00:05:00] lived, 

Rhandyl: right? Yeah. Um,

Brady: Yeah, she was born and at that time it was scary and weird, but again, like nothing bad had ever happened in our life. So we didn't think, I dunno, was It was possible. Yeah. You just think , okay, that was really hard. This will be a really hard lesson to learn. Mm-hmm. But you assume that everything is gonna be normal. Yeah. Yep. 

But then they took my wife to recovery and then the neonatologist from the hospital we were at said very , matter of fact we believe your daughter had a massive brain injury and she needs to go to a level four nicu. Whoa. We were like. It was just like completely surreal. So they, luckily , we live in Denver, so there's a lot of hospitals in the hospital. Yeah. System we were at was like, I think it was like a 10 minute drive away from this other hospital. They had a level four nicu. And so they took our daughter in an ambulance, and then they took my wife into another ambulance, and then I had to go back [00:06:00] to valet, , and get our car. Oh my gosh. Yeah. And that, I think that was like one, the moments that sticks out to you. 

Deonna: You couldn't ride with your, you couldn't ride with your baby. 

Brady: I don't even remember, if that was an option. 

Deonna: Maybe 'cause of Covid you couldn't, I know when my daughter got hurt, I couldn't ride in the ambulance with her.

Brady: Then going to valet and I feel like I had just seen them less than an hour ago. 

Rhandyl: It's gotta be so scary 

Brady: and they could tell that something wasn't right 'cause I Right. they just didn't go well. Yeah. I remember calling my parents and trying to drive to the ho this other hospital, we were just sobbing and we weren't really even talking. Oh man. I remember I was like tunnel vision and I like, sure. I can't believe I was able to drive there. Probably wasn't safe.

Yeah. So then we made to this other hospital and, our daughter was quickly put on this hypothermia blanket that basically cools the body down. And they then they give a lot of meds to basically shut off all brain activity and all functions to allow the body to heal.

We didn't know it then, but the injury that she [00:07:00] was born with was called HIE Hypoxic. Ischemic Encephalopathy, which basically just means at some point in the birth process, blood and oxygen was cut off from her brain. Yeah. 

And that's one of the only therapeutic treatments right now is to just shut off the brain basically and cool the body because apparently if there are neurons that are not damaged. Sometimes the neurons that were damaged can just fire and go haywire. And then take and damage some of the other neurons more. Oh wow. Yeah. 

Yeah. But so then they cooled her body for about 72 hours. And I, again, I don't think my wife and I realized how serious it was. But luckily the hospital we were at, my wife was able to be in a recovery room down the hall. But whenever we went into the room where our daughter was, it was like very serious. And the doctors and nurses seemed not scared, but I think they understood the gravity. Cause she was on a ventilator and they threw everything at her. And we didn't realize it now, but the ventilator she was [00:08:00] on was, I think it's called a concentrator. Oscillator. Oh, 

Deonna: an oscillator. Yeah. 

Brady: Whatever. Like the big yeah. Words like, yeah, that's the about, it was a very scary one and it was on the highest setting and I don't, we didn't know what that any of that meant.

Rhandyl: Sure. Like the last assume you guys, I assume you and your wife were not in the medical field. Oh no, not at all. Prior to this at all, had no medical experience. 

Brady: My wife, she happens to work in healthcare more on the administrative side of things. Okay. But my whole career has been in advertising and marketing. So I knew nothing about actual medical stuff. Yeah. 

Deonna: That's how I was too. Yeah. I came from like the creative side of things and it was, I feel like for a creative type brain to go into the medical fields, it's very difficult 'cause they don't go together like we don't think the same way a medical person does.

Brady: Not always, I always have to come up with these crazy analogies in my head. And I explain it to the doctor and they're like, what? I'm like no it's 

Deonna: not this. And 

Brady: [00:09:00] they're like, no. 

Deonna: Yeah. We're not built for that. No. So you get over to the hospital and, all this is happening. What were they telling you as far as, what future the plan was? The future was gonna hold the plan. Yeah. 

Brady: This is something I'm still processing and , I still think about. Back then it felt like most of the doctors did a terrible job explaining things to us. And I still think that they should have done a better job. We found out about HIE because one of the doctors said HIE kids like your daughter. And we were like, what? 

Rhandyl: Oh no. 

Brady: And then they just handed me a pamphlet. And so that's how we found out. And then later she has vision impairments. She has that's called CVI, cortical visual Impairment. And the doctor said you know your daughter's blind, right? We were like, 

Deonna: yeah, Holly. No, they're the worst sometimes. Yeah. They are the worst. I know I've been through similar things. 

Brady: There was [00:10:00] one good story, and it still gets me very emotional is one of the neonatologists, happened. It was a friend of a friend's dad. Was the doctor. And it was, it had to be like three in the morning. And I was sleeping on a chair , and I remember just, I would always just walk over to the room. And the neonatologist was in there and it was a pretty quiet night which just like nothing really going on. And the doctor was sitting in the room. I don't know, it was just very relaxed. We were talking about what life would be like and all those things.

Sorry to take a deep breath. 'cause it always gets me choked. Always gets me choked up. No, you're good. 

Deonna: Hey. But we we're okay at it. We've shed a lot of tears. 

Brady: Yeah. Like your daughter might not ever do math. She might not ever go to college. She might not do a lot of things. But , he said, I know a lot of successful people that are really good at all those things, but they're miserable. your daughter will have the love for parents, which is what everybody wants. Yeah. Wow. And 

so [00:11:00] that's was one of the most like profound 

Rhandyl: it's something you needed to hear at that moment in time.

Brady: It's still one of the things that still centers you Sure. When you think about because even though there's, the processing is still you come to terms with it and you're at peace with it, and then something else triggers you or, yes. Mm-hmm. Um, 

Rhandyl: And this was about how long into her hospital stay when you guys had this conversation?

Brady: I dunno. She was only in the NICU for three and a half weeks was Oh wow. So it was like, yeah, maybe two weeks. 

Deonna: She was young when you had this conversation. Yeah. She was So you guys were still 

Rhandyl: processing like the whole grief of what you thought that this child had this normal pregnancy and utero experience and then this so, and it's your first kid. It's, yeah. I've been there 'cause my disabled daughter, she was our first too and, those first few weeks, you just have so many unknowns and you have these people telling you, [00:12:00] outcomes that really they can't predict. Yeah, because , so much of kids with cerebral palsy, what they're gonna be able to do. It takes years for you to actually know what, a prognosis might be and things change all the time.

But I can imagine being told all these things nonchalantly through pamphlets and just in a, like a round, like they're in rounds and you hear this and you're like, wait, what? Nobody told me this. To having someone actually sit with you and let you know Hey, yeah, this, your life's gonna be different than what you had imagined for your family, there's still gonna be love. And . Like you said for me as well, and I know like for Deonna, that is what holds the glue together is just have to remember that not only then, but every day since. And it's, it's what keeps us all sane and makes us better parents. Yeah. ,

Deonna: Yeah, that's a good quote. I love it when a doctor can step [00:13:00] outside of the science of it and just Yeah. Be real with you. That sounds really special that he Yeah. Could do that. 

Brady: He was, I think it's, yeah, I agree. I think it's the, a lot of the doctors we've learned is have had. There's really young doctors that are amazing as well, but I think that experience the doctors that have been working for a really long time sometimes can have, I sometimes they can also be like very cold 'cause they've seen everything. But yeah, I guess there's no bad. You just never know.

Rhandyl: But they've seen and they, sometimes you have the seasoned doctors that have more empathy 'cause they've seen the trials and the tribulations that parents have gone through. Yeah. Over the years and even, into the future. Yeah. So it sounds like he's a gem. But yeah, 

Brady: to give some of the other doctors credit now, , 'cause your perspective changes as you learn more. And now I. The doctors are really giving their everything to this kid. And I think their fear mm-hmm. and their worry is always we're gonna send them home to a family and they're not [00:14:00] gonna have any resources to take care of the kid. And in their eyes, I think they're also worried for the kid as well, because I think a lot of these kids probably get surrendered and or the family just has no infrastructure to care for them, right? And so I think they are, they're also, that's also protection for themselves as well. Yeah. Yeah. 

Oh 

Rhandyl: no, I agree with that. Okay. She was in the hospital for three weeks approximately before you guys brought her home. So can you walk us through those first few weeks or moments? After you got a fairly clear picture of your daughter's life from then, and then once you guys got home what it felt like obviously I'm sure you were in fight or flight mode. Can you describe how that felt? If, honestly, did 

Deonna: she have another diagnosis besides HIE? That's kind of part partly in that too. 

Brady: I, so when she was first [00:15:00] discharged if I'm remembering correctly, I think HIE was just the main primary diagnosis. Yeah. She also, she did fail the newborn vision and hearing screening. And, but I think the assumption was she would also have cerebral palsy and then with a lot of kids with HIE, there's epilepsy and infantile spasms are really common as well. Mm-hmm. So we were, those are all sort of the things that we were like watching out for, but they were never officially diagnosed. Yeah. 'Cause funny enough, she actually could eat from a bottle pretty easily when she was discharged. Oh, that's great. That's great. What we've learned is like a lot of times the I think it's the brainstem basically, it's just a reflex that newborns have to eat from a bottle. Yeah. But then they also told us, like at, I think it's six weeks it integrates and then it just, her eating just fell off a cliff completely. That's crazy. Um, But it was nice for the first month we're like, oh, we have a normal a normal kid. Oh man. 

So it was this weird, it's so hard to describe and put myself in that mindset, but it was [00:16:00] normal. But we were also. , Getting a ton of services already we were referred to early intervention and here in Denver there's this, a group called the Anchor Center for Blind Children.

It's like a program for kids up to five. With any kind of vision disorder. And they actually are one of the main schools in the country for CVI. And so she actually, I think she's still like the youngest kid ever to perceive services at Anchor. I think she was like, wow. Four or five or six weeks old when we started seeing them oh wow. That's way, that's amazing. Soon. Yeah. And we got hooked up to early intervention, super early. So I think it was like this weird feeling where we were preparing for, I don't wanna say preparing for the worst. That sounds so harsh, but no, 

Deonna: that's true though. A lot at the time.

Brady: Yeah. But then still just not allowing a daughter to not, be limited or Sure. Not hold her back, but just see what she's gonna do. Yeah. And maximize all those things and not [00:17:00] necessarily look back at what happened just

Rhandyl: move forward.

Brady: We tried to move forward with accepting it and allowing her to show us what she was gonna be like, 

Rhandyl: yeah, 

Deonna: We do that too. Like one of my favorite quotes is, don't trip on what's behind you. And it's so true because your daughter was a mix of me and Rhandyl's worlds. It was like an injury sort of, but at the birth. So it's, it's tough, but there's so many things where, and I know your wife probably felt this way what if we had done this? What if I had done that? Mm-hmm. You know, Or whatever. Yeah. And I have those bad feelings too, and Yeah. So it's know. I do too. It's good to just, I know, I do too. Move forward. Like you can't go back and beat yourself up for what you didn't know or uncontrollable things, but that's easier said than done. 

Brady: Yeah, I for sure. I think that's one thing is as a dad, I can't relate to those things at all because yeah. I think my wife still struggles with a lot of those. What about feelings? The thought of our daughter having some sort of issue [00:18:00] while. She's in utero. Yeah. That's still really painful. 

Deonna: Which she would never know that, but it's still Yeah. Yeah. It's, I have body, so Thank you.

Brady: Yeah. A lot. We've done all the genetic testing and whole exome sequence and, we've done just about everything you can do to make sure there wasn't any issues. And , every doctor basically comes to the same conclusion. It was just a total freak event that really couldn't have been avoided. Same with us. So it was like, yeah, I think for what happened, it was probably the best possible case scenario. I don't think we realized it then, and it's easier to say now, but I don't think she would've survived. If it wasn't for all this intervention and help that we got from the doctors. 

Rhandyl: Yeah. Oh yeah. And the quick transfer to the level four nicu. Yeah. Like they were on top of it all really fast and Totally. Then as soon as you got home, you got the early intervention and everything. 

How old is your daughter now? 

Brady: She'll be five this summer. Okay. 

Deonna: , What kind of capabilities does [00:19:00] she have? Or what kind of prognosis do they give you for her? 

Brady: That's, that's so funny to answer. 'cause we just went through the IEP process, and if you read the, oh God, the document,, it paints such a bleak picture. I know. Because I feel like all they do is look at a checklist. Can she sit, can she stay in, can she swap? It's no it's no. Yeah. She needs a hundred percent of support for every possible thing. And it's weird because now she's just our daughter. Like it's very normal to us. Yeah. And she's super funny. She's very cool and chill, like she's everyone's favorite person. 'cause she's the cool kid that's really calm and funny and goofy. And she loves, movies and songs and reading and I'm convinced that when she's in kindergarten next year, she'll be like, the easiest kid in the class because she'll just sit there and just absorb information and she loves it.

Deonna: So is she verbal 

Brady: she has an aac. Yeah. And she uses head switches to select and sort to sort and, but she's totally I don't even know what the right clinical term is. [00:20:00] Nonverbal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you like, just look at her on paper, like she's very disabled.

Rhandyl: That's exactly how I feel. Like my daughter, the same thing. , On paper she's super scary. And then you, like you said, all the little check boxes, medically, but that's just like a outside looking in picture. Once you get to know them, their capabilities are so much more than then what these check boxes are on certain exams and things like that. 

Brady: It's a, yeah. She's so much less gearing. Intimidating once you actually get to know her 

Deonna: in real life. Yeah.

How do y'all feel about that? Her going into kindergarten and stuff?

Brady: She'll be in public school. Yeah. And I don't know. We're very scared. I was so scared. 

Deonna: I was so scared. I was scared of how people were gonna be towards Allie because she is cognitively. Aware of people saying weird stuff to her or, whatever. But it's actually been really [00:21:00] pretty good. But yeah, it's just intimidating, like that initial walking. Yeah. I don't think I've ever been more nervous about anything in my life than walking through the doors the first day and being like, oh my gosh. Because it wasn't kindergarten for us. It was like first grade, but, 

Brady: oh gosh. Yeah. Was she in kindergarten before her injury? 

Deonna: No, she got hurt when she was, not in school yet when she was four, and then she had to do kindergarten, like a home bound type deal. So she didn't get to go. But kids are always, they'll surprise you. They're less weird about things than you think they're gonna be. And if she's been in pre-K, she's already been exposed to kids and knows what that's gonna be like. 

Brady: Kids also really like helping her, kids like to push her wheelchair and I don't know. I think it's, I'm excited and she'll also be like. At a school that's walking distance like five minutes away 

Deonna: oh yeah, that's doing better. That makes you feel better. 

Brady: That makes me feel a lot, yeah, it makes us feel a lot better. Yeah. Because 

Deonna: of her visual impairments, , is she gonna learn braille or is that something y'all [00:22:00] are gonna do or is it 

Brady: not really? 'Cause she also has hearing impairments as well and Right with her cp, she has spastic quad cp, so she has a really hard time moving her arms. Yeah.

Deonna: Her hands voluntarily control of her hands. Yeah. Yeah. I That makes sense. That makes sense. 

Brady: And when she wears hearing aids, she has pretty normal hearing. And so she definitely, she can hear and process things that way. 

Deonna: She reads. Does she do like audio books or something? Can she listen to audio books? 

Brady: She listens to do you guys know Tonies? 

Rhandyl: Oh yes. You're obsessed with Tonies? 

Deonna: Yeah. Rhandyl got me into Tonies. 

Rhandyl: Oh my gosh. My daughter is obsessed. We have, I don't even know. I step on 'em daily and 

Deonna: Yeah, they're worse than Legos. What's her favorite, what's her favorite Tonnie? 

Brady: It depends on the time of day. It's at nighttime it's like there's a Peppa Pig nighttime. Yeah, yeah. We have that one in the morning. It's, it usually starts with Daniel [00:23:00] Tiger. And then if it's really late at night Peter Rabbit, because it's whoa. Oh, I haven't got that. Yeah, it's really good for like two in the morning and you can't sleep. I need to get the daniel Tiger one. It's really good. And then daytime, it's always Cocoa Encanto, tangled. Mm-hmm. Beauty and the Beast. All of the, all the Disney. Yeah. Yeah. Her favorite. None of us are Spanish speakers, but for some reason our daughter loves Spanish speaking and like she loves Cocoa and Encanto. She prefers the Spanish versions.

Deonna: Oh. How funny. Maybe she's bilingual. You just don't know. 

Brady: Yeah. She really likes Mexican folk music.

Deonna: That is so cute. That's so cool. So funny. I love that stuff. I'm from New Mexico, so oh, nice.

Rhandyl: Okay. So Brady, what are some of the hardest parts about caring for your daughter with this specific diagnosis?

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Brady: I think the hardest thing for me personally, day in [00:25:00] and day out, it's just the repetition I really struggle with daily repetitive tasks. Yeah. I have ADHD but it's the washing syringes. It's the cleaning syringes, it's drawing up meds. It's like 

Rhandyl: the daily grind of it all. Yeah. 

Brady: Like when you're finally able to relax and chill on the couch for a second, then you have to get up and suction and it's like the, yep. It's the little stuff that just feels so unrelenting for me. Mm-hmm. Um, mm-hmm. I think that's like the hardest thing personally for me. 

Rhandyl: Now you guys are in Colorado, I know of every state's different. Does your daughter qualify for any sort of nursing services or respite services? 

Brady: She qualifies for pretty much everything in Colorado is amazing. So my wife and I are both caregivers through, it's called IHSS in home support services. Okay. Through the C-H-C-B-S waiver here in Colorado. And through that she also qualifies for [00:26:00] private duty nursing and so she has a nurse, which usually just started like a week ago. Oh. Integrating nursing. 

Rhandyl: Oh, we have so many tips. That's a whole nother episode. I know. The way it's

Deonna: awkward un until you realize how much they're helping you, and then you're just like, whatever. I don't care. But it is hard. 

Brady: The very specific frustration I have, and Justin, if you're listening, I'm sorry, but , our daughter has a G-tube and Yeah. For some reason my wife and I don't, we've never liked those like tubi pad things. And so we still do the tic-tac toe with the split gauze. And I hate the way everybody does the tape. Drives me. 

Rhandyl: No, I totally get that. I have these specific things that drive me nuts if they're not done, like I'm Exactly, I'm pretty type A when it comes to her cares.

And yes, 

Brady: I even organize the syringes a certain way. You gotta be like, 

Rhandyl: yeah, but honestly so my advice [00:27:00] as a parent, 

Brady: let it go. 

Rhandyl: No. Like you show them exactly how you want it done. Okay. , Because you know what works best for your kid. And so I know, but 

Brady: I dunno if it works best for her, if it's just 'cause I like it that way.

Deonna: I always go like this, I'm like, this is how I want it done, do whatever. But this is how we're going to do it. And it's like, yeah, I'm oh, you have freedom, but actually you don't like do it exactly like I want you to do it. But 

Brady: I passively aggressive, re-did all of her tape. Last week I just oh, I couldn't even look at that. I can't even look at it. 

Deonna: , We all become totally neurotic, psychos about this stuff, but there's certain things that if you don't do them the right way, they could get an infection or they could get, or a reaction or something.

Something. Yeah. Yeah. But no, all of our nurses are so great, but yeah, they all do little different things and sometimes we just laugh and are like, that's, I know who did that, or I know who did this. 

Rhandyl: Yeah, some things are petty and you just let it go. But then there's some things that if it's just bothers you that much, I'm just pretty open about [00:28:00] okay, yeah, this is the way we do it with my child and yeah. Let's practice. And 

Deonna: I do know it's a different experience with the dads though. Like we have all girl nurses and stuff, and there's times where my husband's like, can you tell them to do X, Y, and Z? Because if I say it, it seems like, you know, it's like the dad and he is like scary or whatever. But then I have to say it because I'm less, intimidating.

Which is funny because between the two of us, me and my husband, I'm more of the shark about stuff. But yeah, my husband just physically is intimidating and so he's like, can you tell them because I don't want them to be scared of me. And I'm like, okay. Which none of them are scared of him, but that's funny. Oh man. 

Brady: Yeah. Yeah. Our daughter has a male nurse too, which is he's wonderful, but I, it's just, yeah, I don't know. It just makes you. It's just it's initially uncomfortable, but then you get to know that they're just like, if there's a male nurse in pediatric home care, there's probably a reason that he wanted Yeah. To do that. 

Deonna: Yeah. Oh [00:29:00] yeah. There's so many great guy nurses out there. I, 

Rhandyl: my husband is a, oh, he is? Yeah, but not pediatric. He works he's a nurse practitioner now, but Nice. For years. He's, he is been a nurse since 2006 and so yeah, he but he's usually, he's inpatient adult and trauma. Nice.

Things like that, but Nice. I think if I just wanted you. 

Deonna: Yeah. Didn't he say PD wasn't his vibe? And then he had a kid that has all these medical issues. 

Rhandyl: So when he was in nursing school, they were like his mom asked him like, do you know what you wanna do after you graduate? What field? And he was like I know what I don't wanna do. And that's pediatrics and anything to do with trachs and 

Deonna: oh geez, here we go. And God's like, yeah, we'll see about that. Yeah. 

Rhandyl: It's funny how things work out. Oh, my 

Brady: secretions are the only thing that gross me out. I could deal with poop, blood, pee. 

Rhandyl: That's how my husband is. He just cannot, he's not secretions. It just, he can't. So funny. 

Deonna: They are pretty bad. I thought I was super anti blood, but [00:30:00] I, yeah. Like those can get me. But vomit will always be my number one. Yeah. 

So what were, what are some of your positive, unexpected, or just surprising good moments that have come out of this experience of raising your daughter?

Brady: So I talked with another mom a couple weeks ago and she told me to make sure that I'm still prioritizing my hopes in life and dreams and things like that. And so I'm not questioning this, but I think, there's nuance in all of this. I'm not saying that you need to just become content with doing nothing.

Yeah. But because you still need to , have hopes and dreams and aspirations and take time to be a human. Yeah. But I will say, I think the biggest thing I've learned is that you just become so much more appreciative of like very simple moments. Even if the day you just go outside and you get to walk around the block or even just go to the backyard and feel the sun, like that could be a really [00:31:00] good moment.

And just to let go of expectations. I'm still learning how to do that, but i'm a very anxious person and a lot when I realize it, it's because I have expectations of what I want the day to be like or what I want, something to happen, but then just like realize oh wait, that's not, that doesn't actually need to happen. So I think just learning to be more content.

And then also I grew up very Christian, evangelical, conservative, and I thought I understood, like I've got opinions about everything I. What I think is right and wrong, but I quickly learned that like it's pretty, life is really hard for people who aren't made for this world or the world. Wasn't designed around them. Certain reasons. World is not the right way to put it, but no, I know what you mean. Pretty easy as a white dude. Yeah. 

And you quickly learn that like it's really hard for people who are on the outer edges of society and who rely on programs and are so much more [00:32:00] vulnerable. And so I think I've learned to just be so much more empathetic towards other people's situations and until you realize what they're going through, you really have no idea. No. Um, And that goes with other medical parents and really anything I'm not saying you only can have lived experience to have an opinion on things, but I think it's important to realize that, life is really hard for a lot of people. And yeah. I think it's important to just have that empathy for whatever it's they're going through. 

Deonna: I relate to that 'cause , I mean, I grew up in a very traditional Christian, environment and I thought I just knew everything and it was very black and white

and then now after what's happened with Ali, I just I've had a very huge shift in what I think, and I still am a Christian. I still believe in a lot of those fundamental things, but sometimes I can hear really conservative Christian views and I'm like I don't know. And that, and I know what you're saying because I've had moments where.

I'm much more sensitive to [00:33:00] marginalized groups.

But I like, the thing is there's so many different groups who are treated like crap, like different races, different disabilities, things like this. And it has made me way more sensitive and vocal. Yeah. If I feel like someone is not being treated well, I Yeah, I know what you're saying. Yeah. It definitely, what do you think about that?

Rhandyl: Yeah. I have a very similar childhood background raised in a very traditional Christian home. You. Grandparents all still married my, just very traditional American family that you visualize in a small town. Very conservative. And , wasn't aware of the disability world really at all until I was thrown into it. I was aware of it but I, was just so sheltered in a way for so long. And then [00:34:00] once going to college your views change. I'm still a Christian, but I definitely have found that some of the religious things that are , not necessarily all of them are biblical, and I've just really found that my mind is a lot more open to so many things.

But my faith has flourished in all the traumatic experiences that I've had Yeah. On that. But it's also totally changed my perspective from what I thought and believed and thought the world was like. Yeah. Prior to having this experience and this living, this journey. Yeah. So I totally understand what you're saying.

Brady: It's a weird Yeah. I'm still very mad at God. I haven't gone to church in, I don't know, longer than my daughter's been alive, but my desire to go has gone down a lot. And I still have faith. I. In Jesus. And like I understand that someday I might understand more about why all this [00:35:00] happened. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But I definitely don't still, because, I'm still mad that it happened to my daughter and I don't understand why yeah, 

Rhandyl: no, I think that's a normal feeling, 

Brady: like why these things have to happen to our kids. Definitely.

Deonna: It's a painful feeling and I, and we may never know. Yeah. No. And it's interesting because sometimes I feel like. First of all, I think it's okay to be mad at God. I think God can handle all of our big emotions. He's not sensitive in that way. Yes. Like he can handle it because I was so mad too.

I was like, God, I had a perfect life. , This happened. What is going on? I don't understand why this is happening to me. Like this is stuff that happens to other people. Yeah. And it was just such a, it blew my mind, that this could be happening and we've had, bad things happen since. But, it is difficult because there, there have been people in my life in the last, five years of dealing with this who are in the church or whatever, who are very [00:36:00] ableist or racist or is all the ISTs, and you just have to realize they are imperfect

yeah. But it was brutal. To me to have to reconsider my faith , in 2020. It just was like, it was so brutal to me to think, oh, I thought God was gonna protect me from pain, and he's not doing that right now. And I don't understand what's happening. But yeah, it is funny to me because like when you this is something I think about a lot, but, when people think about Jesus, I think a lot of people like to think of this guy who just, was perfect and he I don't know.

Like they don't think of him on a human level. And it's just interesting to me because when you think of him on a human level and you see all of his interactions with disabled people in like his interactions and what he did, like he had no fear of disability or, death or these things like [00:37:00] that I used to be afraid of.

So now it's interesting to me because I think I need to be like Jesus in the way that this stuff doesn't intimidate me. And I'm not afraid to touch a child who has. Some sort of , disability. Like these things didn't bother him. Yeah. I think Jesus was a very radical person and it just is. It's funny though sometimes to think back on like our childhood yeah. View of him and the church and then now after being on the other side of this Yeah. 

Brady: Yeah, just coming to terms with a lot of conflicting thoughts and ideas. Sure.

Deonna: It's very tricky to figure all that out, out. 

Rhandyl: I dealt with a lot of I felt like I was being punished for some reason, for something that I had done in the past when my daughter was born and we went through all of the trauma and continue to go through. And I don't necessarily have those thought snes often, but sometimes it, they still cross my mind and that's not something that. [00:38:00] God does, but you can't help. But sometimes, yeah. I think it's just part of that parent guilt and the, what could I have done differently, but yeah. You mentioned that your daughter loves Tonies music. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Um, Listening to movies, but what are some of her other favorite things? What brings her joy? 

Brady: Yeah. We love gardening together. Oh, fun. We I like, took out all my energy on creating a sensory garden for her's. Cool. With like different smells and textures and things like that. We have a little garden in the back with her name on it. And so gardening and like going to Botanic Gardens just being outside I think just being in Colorado, there's this idea that everything you do has to be like super hardcore and uhhuh. Yeah.

Now we're just having, just like being outside, going to Denver Organic Gardens. Denver's that's beautiful though. That's our taught is the Denver Botanic Gardens. Shout out to the Botanic Gardens. Our community center board, Rocky and Human Services, pays for a membership to us to go to the Botanic Gardens. Oh, [00:39:00] that's nice. It's like our family's favorite thing to do. 

Deonna: I love that. . I love being outside in nature. You have a little bit prettier views than we do in Lubbock, but yeah, 

Rhandyl: we're basically the desert,

Deonna: Okay. So what would you tell a parent whose child is getting a difficult diagnosis 

Brady: I think about this all the time. The things I hated were, I know how you feel. My daughter was in the nicu, or my , my daughter had high bilirubin levels. 

Rhandyl: Oh my gosh. I get the same thing.

Brady:  It's that's not the same. So I try to, never say anything like, I know how you feel because I don't know, because it's, every experience is so different. Yeah. The best advice actually, we were given one of my best friend's dad is involved with Medicaid, and he was like, make sure before you leave , you get signed up for everything.

So that's, I would, that's advice I didn't want to hear then, but i'm so glad and grateful that he gave it to us. It was really difficult for us to process.

Rhandyl: But, and it's such a pain, the [00:40:00] process, it's a pain, but it's much easier. 

Deonna: But having a case manager right there who's helping you because, 

Brady: so I would say, yeah, take advantage of the case caseworker and try to get all the logistics stuff and paperwork done because it's so much more isolating and painful to do on your own and confusing. , And the second one is , such a fluffy thing to say, and it, I, it, I feel, I worry, it could sound so meaningless, but telling them it's gonna be okay. Because I think that's the thing that I wish I would've known was like, it's gonna be okay. No. It's hard, but you'll adjust. It'll become normal. Yeah, it's something you'll always feel and, but it's going to be okay and life is going to be okay. Life as you know, it is not over.

Yeah, it's just different. Different.

Deonna: And it's OI think it's okay to tell people it's going to be okay, and you may say, it's not okay right now. You feel like that, I think that's why we all do this [00:41:00] stuff is to show other people , there is light on the other side of a darkness and 

Yeah.

Deonna: But yeah, in those moments you, I thought my life was over or I thought my daughter's life was over. For sure. But 

Brady: yeah. Yeah. 

Deonna: It is gonna be okay. It just may not be okay in the way you thought it was going to be. 

Brady: Yeah. And is, and again there are several times a day that I'm. Sad and depressed and I have to go to counseling and take antidepressants and 

process all the 

things. 

Brady: Yeah. Like I, I feel like I'm a total mess, but at the same time, I do think it's gonna be okay. 

Deonna: Yeah. Yeah. No, it just don't say it's gonna be easy. That's a very different thing. No, yeah. It's definitely 

Brady: easy. It's just yeah.

It'll be okay.

Rhandyl: So Brady, what's the best thing, if you could choose one thing or a few things that have come out of this journey, raising your daughter, things that she may have taught you throughout the last five years?

Brady: So the best thing to come out of this, [00:42:00] it's hard to even think, but we have three kids now, so we have mm-hmm. our daughter who's almost five, and then our son who's two and a half, and then our newborn, or she's not a newborn anymore, but she's seven months old. It's been really fun to see our oldest be a sister. It's old. It's really cool to see our siblings or her younger siblings have a disabled, older sister.

She is hilarious and awesome and really great with them and very patient and lets them climb all over her. And our son, I think prefers playing with kids in wheelchairs 'cause it's so normal to him. 

Yeah. Yeah. 

Brady: And he talks about how he wants to be a doctor or a nurse. Aw. It's, so that's, it's just so cool to see him.

Take an interest in things or like when she's choking Yeah. He'll run over and tap her chest. Aw. And we never told him that he just had seen us do it. And so that's really cool. He 

Deonna: knows. Yeah. Even like 

Brady: the other day, he like turned on her suction machine to help suction her mouth and he did to the side.

He didn't even [00:43:00] choke her. That's amazing. It was, I was impressed. So that's probably the coolest. I think the other thing is I started a diaper company.

Deonna: Yeah. Yeah. Tell us about this. We wanna talk about this here at the end. So tell us all about it. 

Brady: Yeah. So our daughter got older and bigger she was approaching like the size six, size seven in the baby brands.

And 

Brady: my wife and I were like, what do people use next? And so we asked the DME and we asked everybody in our community and. The, there was not like a very clear, obvious answer. It was everybody was using different makeshift options. And I was like, there's no way that can be like all these kids that just have these makeshift options for between 40, 50 pounds and like a hundred Yeah.

Plus pounds for 

Deonna: like a huge necessity. Yeah. Yeah. 

Brady: For a diaper. And so I had this this seed planted in my head and never in my life did I ever think I would start a company. It just wasn't even something I ever thought of.

But I just felt [00:44:00] this it sounds so cliche, but this like calling of like 

Do this. Keep, yeah. 

Brady: Keep exploring this and then 

I, I just, the more research I did, the more people I talked to, the more diaper industry people I talked to one of my long-term mentors is this guy named Perry.

He was one of my first bosses out of college. Both my parents are teachers and my mom was occupational therapist at a school district. My dad was an elementary school counselor. So they're not very good at like business advice. Yeah. Perry was always the guy I'd go to for like, how to negotiate a salary or how to talk to my boss or,

those sort of business questions. And I talk to him once a week and then twice a week. And then long story short, he came on as co-founder and we're now Oh, okay. Equal partners working full-time, building out these diapers. , None of us have any experience in like consumer packaged goods or diaper industry at all.

But it's been one of these interesting things that like the more you explore it and the more you pull on that thread, you realize that there's a [00:45:00] pretty huge opportunity for a brand to speak to our families like humans. And like 

Rhandyl: yeah, 

Brady: in a way to normalize it and talk about disability.

Like it's not necessarily a good or a bad thing. And I think all of us are consumers and we want to use brands that we like and support. Yeah. But the medical brands just always felt so . Boring and sterile and like they talk to you like so it's so sad and cold and just 'cause my daughter wears diapers doesn't mean that she wants really boring, like kids, like cool underwear. 

Rhandyl: Yeah. 

Deonna: Yeah. 

Rhandyl: Yeah. I remember, I think it's been, it was a few years ago that you sent out surveys. Yeah. To a lot of parents. And I felt I filled it out and it was around the time that my daughter was transitioning, like outgrowing the size sevens and I was just like, I don't know what to do after this.

And I remember filling the survey out and I'm like, oh my gosh, if this actually comes through, like it's going to be [00:46:00] awesome. What a great idea. I was just like, how come nobody else has thought of this before?

Brady: Yeah, it's, 

Rhandyl: it's, so yeah. And then here you are. . , You guys have started it and we're in that stage for sure now.

And like my daughter, totally outgrew those. And so we tried multiple other options and they were either too big, they weren't absorbent enough. We ended up, we now have to add diaper liners, boosters, yeah. To help increase like, 'cause she's old enough now. Yes. Those pads and tan pads, we, yeah, because she's older now and she Yeah, she, even though I think she cognitively could potty train, but physically she just can't.

Yeah. And so it's like she will hold her bladder and only have two or three wet diapers a day and, but they're huge and they always end [00:47:00] up with, a whole change of clothes and Yeah. A lot of it is the fit. She has these tiny thighs, right? Yeah. I'm just I. Excited for , these transition diapers. And they're awesome designs, like you said, because the ones we get it are so boring. Yeah. 

Brady: I've initially we wanted to do a bunch of different colors and sizes, but then you learn that it's gets extremely expensive to have Oh, 

Deonna: I believe that.

Different 

Brady: options. So we just chose the one checker pattern. 

Deonna: Yeah. 

Brady: 'Cause I think it's like not, it's not, checker patterns are not for babies. They're not for adult. Like everybody likes a cool checker pattern. 

Rhandyl: Yeah. Gender neutral. Yeah. 

Brady: . We also try to, get a lot of feedback that people are concerned that they're too thin, but we really, care to have a really thin diaper because our daughter likes to wear clothes and like she wears tights and yoga pants.

Yeah. And didn't want like, so bulky, huge, bulky diaper. And when she's in her gait trainer, it's like this wad of fabric. Yeah. And so we intentionally did make them [00:48:00] very thin. And they do hold a lot of output, but we also know at the same time that like every kid's body is so different.

That it's impossible for us to make a perfect product for every single body. Sure. And so really, like right now, we're just trying to get as much feedback as possible on what people want. I just also, didn't want our kids to have to use booster pads and things like that. 'Cause I was like, that's not a solution. That is a a hacky stopgap mm-hmm. station to try to solve a problem. Yeah. We tried to solve a diaper that would do everything, but I don't think we're there quite yet, but I really do hope people know that we're earnestly listening to feedback and working to make improvements. And I am responding to comments, responding to customer support, like it just, there's just two of us. Mm-hmm. And

Rhandyl: yeah, you're busy. I'm sure you're busy. You're in the beginning of it. You're all over. Every time I'm scrolling through my socials, hope is annoying. It's no, you're hustling. I, I love it. I think it's good because I'm [00:49:00] obviously, I'm sure I get all of that through my feed because we are raising disabled children and but yeah, we kind of light in our core demographic. 

Deonna: Is it your goal to, get where it could be approved by insurances, like under DME companies and things like that, 

Brady: so, 

Deonna: because that would be huge.

Brady: Yeah. See, so yes. So I guess to be, I'll be totally open and honest about this, so a lot of the Medicaid reimbursement for diapers is really low. Mm-hmm. And so the companies who make diapers for insurance they have to use a lot of the companies use either cotton fluff or wood pulp, which is a, a pretty lower cost material. And it's good. Mm-hmm. But it's not great. And so my wife and I had used every diaper from insurance from our DME and just were super unhappy because mm-hmm. we think they worked very well. And so we aimed to basically first make something that we thought was really [00:50:00] good and worked really well.

Yeah. And then hoping that as we get bigger and grow, we can figure out pricing down the line. Mm-hmm. So I guess that's all to say my wife and I are hyper, hyper aware. We are on Medicaid, we are part of waiver programs. Yeah. We know how crazy expensive everything for our families are. At the same time, I just really wanted to make a diaper that I felt worked really well. And because of that, it is more expensive than insurance is willing to pay and so, right. That makes sense. If this really hard, 

Deonna: most people aren't on waiver programs and Medicaid, I would say like of all the. People we know who have disabled kids. We're in the minority when it comes to having all of our supplies completely covered. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like most of our friends, we have several friends whose kids they're just not quote unquote disabled enough to, that's really hard on Medicaid and all this stuff. They might have just like a [00:51:00] cognitive disability or whatever, but they need that. And so, um, yeah, I've told lots of parents about y'all because it is a good 

Rhandyl: Yes, same I have. Yeah, I work in pediatric physical therapy, and so I've definitely shared with my families that are in the same predicament. And I know a few kids that, they cannot find a diaper that DME companies provide that their kids don't have skin reactions to. So they pay outta pocket even though they get the diapers or they have the ability to get them paid for through insurance. They just have to purchase diapers out of pocket because it's what's best for their kids.

Deonna: It just cracks me up when I think about this entire concept because you can't imagine, trying to buy like actual cotton underwear for your kids and then all of a sudden you're moving up to the next size and there's literally none being manufactured. That's what this industry is doing to [00:52:00] parents of disabled kids is it's just like, oh yeah, no. Now you need to switch up into a full on adult size when your kid's five. It's insane. 

Brady: The diaper that we were encouraged to switch to is a 20 inch waist to a 34 inch waist. That's, that is like my daughter to me, an adult. I wear a size 34 inch pants. Yeah. Like how could that fit any one person very well? Like it technically might, 

Rhandyl: But yeah, that's whit's laughable i's slap all the things that have been sent for my daughter, like legit postpartum things and I'm like, okay um, yeah, that's not gonna work. Yeah. At all. Tried to make our, as if I ever go into space. Yeah.

Brady: We tried to make our diapers like a very specific more narrow window because yeah, the like 14 inch variance is like so funny. Anybody very, so we tried to aim for much more [00:53:00] realistic sizes.

Rhandyl: Yeah. I love it and I look forward to trying's diapers out and finding the perfect size for my daughter because we are just at, it's, we are just in that time where it's like. It's so tricky. It's almost every diaper is a clothes change and it's just, part of our daily routine, but I think your products are going to help. So as far as feedback, I love that you guys are taking into consideration all the feedback from your buyers Yeah. And making changes experience as needed. Yeah. 

Deonna: So what are your future plans for youth crews? 

Brady: So I guess the future plans are to continue to keep selling our current diaper and get feedback and figure out mm-hmm. exactly what people need and then work with the community to make refinements and make adjustments to make it even better. Yeah. You get a [00:54:00] ton of feedback and questions about a swim diaper.

Oh yeah. So that's something that we think would be really cool. And then also people who do want like a pull on style or pull up style. That's also a need for a lot of people. Yeah. We didn't focus on that initially 'cause our daughter doesn't have trunk support, so like we have to Yeah. Use a tab diaper. But I think those are the two additional products that , we're looking to figure out if they're possible, because we really do want to not just be a diaper company, but. There's so many medical products in our lives that we feel are just made without people understanding what our lives are actually like. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And they're just, I don't know, like 

Rhandyl: not user friendly. They're not user friendly, realistic, and 

Brady: They just don't look good in your 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 year old's room. Like it's not it's not a hospital room. Like it's their room. And non-disabled kids have so many options for soap and all these cool brands, but once you get into the medical side of things, it's just it's [00:55:00] so. it's just like cold white. Yeah, 

Deonna: I know. We always, like with my daughter, try to make her room this room that is a kid's room and yeah, it's just funny 'cause one and one of her shelves is completely filled with all of her medical crap and there's no way we can avoid that. But then everywhere else I'm always like trying to hide the fact that, that's medical or that, and yeah, it is difficult 'cause everything looks like it belongs in an ICU and Yeah. Yeah. 

Brady: We're grateful for it. But yeah, I love the stuff and I'm grateful for it, but I just wish it was. For a home and for a house.

Rhandyl: And more aesthetically pleasing. I understand. 

Deonna: Oh yeah. I like for things to always look good and it's seriously one of my most difficult character, I don't know, flaws, is I just, I want everything to look cute or cool and then when it doesn't, it drives me nuts. My husband's like, it's okay, don't worry about that. I'm like, no, it looks bad. I gotta redo this or fix this, or whatever. [00:56:00] That's yours. Oh my goodness. Creative background. I, yeah, I like for things to look well, I know sometimes Rhandyl's like, oh my gosh, probably. I'm like, no, I gotta redo that. Thought's terrible 

Rhandyl: for, it's the organization. Of course I want things to, look pretty, but my priority is as long as things are organized, and hopefully outta sight for the most part, then I'm okay. But yeah.

Brady, we have thoroughly enjoyed this conversation with you. Thank you so much for sharing your story about your daughter and your life, and then obviously this awesome company that you have founded. And we want everyone to follow Youth Crews on Instagram and Facebook and everywhere. You can share that here with us for our listeners where to find you and any details that you might want to put out there for our listeners. 

Brady: Awesome. Yeah. Thank you for having me. , It's been amazing getting to know you and just having this conversation and just even larger being a part of [00:57:00] this world. I started listening to this podcast like. I don't exactly remember when, but it feels like a long time. So thank you for all the work you do as well.

We're most active on Instagram. Our handle is @youth.crews, and then Facebook is at Youth Crews Kids. , Those are probably the two platforms where we're most active. And then also just our website is youth.crews.com. Again, that's where we have our sizing pack and the full cartons right now. That's really the best way to get started is with the sizing pack because you can at least try one on of each size before you roll the dice and buy a full carton. .

Rhandyl: Thanks so much Brady. 

Brady: Thank you so much for having me.

**Disclaimer

Before we go, I wanna remind our listeners that this podcast is for the purpose of education and entertainment only, and is not a replacement for seeing a doctor. We suggest you seek out the help of a trained professional for help with your child's specific situation.